I wrote about the Taoist Farmer story in another post Schrodinger's Cat and the Value of Uncertainty in a Continuously Connected World, but as I continue to work on myself, it reveals new layers of meaning for me. Here is the story again:

There is a Taoist story of an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years.  One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. "Such bad luck," they said sympathetically.

"Who knows?" the farmer replied.

The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it three other wild horses. "How wonderful!" the
neighbors exclaimed.

"Who knows?" replied the old man.

The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The
neighbors again came to offer their sympathy for his misfortune.

"Who knows?" answered the farmer.

The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army. Seeing that the son's leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out.

"Who knows?" said the farmer.

Executive/Life coaches often share the Taoist Farmer story with clients who are fused to a particular "story" about the situation they find themselves in. These coaches are trying to get their clients to create some space between their story about a situation and what the ultimate reality might be.

Coaches point out that the lesson of the Taoist Farmer, is, of course, that no event, in and of itself, can truly be judged as good or bad, fortunate or unfortunate. Only with time is the whole story made clear. The thinking goes that helping a client get some space between their story and reality might reduce stress and/or help them move through life with more grace. Nothing wrong with that.

But using the Taoist Farmer story in this way overlooks something fundamental. 

The Taoist farmer didn't cultivate detachment as a means to an end. He didn't keep an open mind to achieve better outcomes for himself. He didn't distance himself from his story about events to lower his blood pressure and stop kickin' the dog. He didn't answer "Who knows?" as a way to better deal with Life's ups and downs.

What looks to be an open-minded approach to Life here is not a "strategy." It's an outcome.

The truth is this: he didn't care.

The Taoist Farmer does not care what happens. He doesn't divide Life into good events and bad events, like piles of laundry. He experiences Life in a unified way....undifferentiated energy/consciousness. Given a choice between another Ice Age or another Renaissance, it would be a jump ball for him.

What looks to be an open-minded approach to life here is not a "strategy." It's an outcome...a byproduct of what he was searching for and of his ultimate realization.

If your clients are tired of being whipsawed by their reactions and want more equanimity in their lives, sharing the Taoist Farmer story with them will probably help.

But it might be even better to point out the path the farmer walked and why he walked it. As the Japanese poet Matsuo Basho said: "Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise. Seek what they sought."

"Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the wise. Seek what they sought."

Matsuo Basho

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This blot post was also published by New Ventures West, a company that trains coaches.